It has been two Country Fridays in a row that I trashed on garbage country songs, meaning we were due for some good news. Important: Josh Gordon is going to be catching football touchdowns later this season. That is really, really important. Equally important? Yesterday I found out Josh Gordon is a country music fan. As Josh pointed out, this should not come as a surprise:

Totally fair point. Why did we assume he doesn’t listen to country? Probably because the country music industry is dominated by caucasians, something Josh Gordon is not. But as always — especially in circumstances related to race — assumptions make an ass out of you and me. 

Anyways, Gordon was playing a game he likes to call “#namethatcountrysong” yesterday, which appeared to involve him driving around and tweeting out lyrics to each song that came on the radio. People would answer as to which country song the lyrics were from, and then he would never respond because he is a celebrity who certainly has no time for our worshipping of his greatness. This is the first tweet I saw: 

A little Darius Rucker, AKA Hootie from Hootie & the Blowfish. It is also, in my humble opinion, one of the only Darius Rucker songs worth caring about, “Alright.” Beautiful stuff, especially considering it made Josh “LOL”. Next one, a few minutes later: 

Uh oh, folks… we got some Ohio implications here. These lyrics are part of Billy Currington’s “People Are Crazy.” The song is about going out to a bar, getting shitfaced with some stranger, and waking up a couple months later to said stranger’s obituary which reveals that he was really rich and left you all the money because you had such a good time drinking beers together, slash, people are crazy.

Then it got really real. Joshua Caleb Gordon hashtagged his #favoritecountryartist and I will be damned if it wasn’t one of my favorites, Kenny Chesney:

“Come Over” is not my favorite Kenny track, but it’s Kenny friggin’ Chesney, baby! Even his shitty songs are worthy of a Josh Gordon tweet. In honor of the revelation that the Clown Show’s favorite wide receiver is a country fan, I have two videos for you. First, let’s do a Kenny Chesney song, in honor of Gordon’s #favoritecountryartist. This is an older song with a spectacularly bizarre video. It is about being a closeted homosexual because, unfortunately, an openly gay country singer would not be marketable and thus the narrator is  searching for a wife, and it’s called “How Forever Feels.”

Last, but not least, my tribute to Josh Gordon and his football achievements of 2013:

See you on November 23, Josh. CAN’T WAIT.

Happy Country Friday.  



Cover image by Erik Drost.